Fallswell that Ends Well

Maybe it was the re-energizing effect of the City vs City Smackdown, maybe it was the sea of new blood (ew, that's a less than tasty, near Biblical image ... I mean "new players"), maybe it was the news that Jerry Falwell finally got called home, but tonight's game was ebullient and jubillent to say the least. It was jubooblient. Actually, any night where I catch a cute blonde at the bar unbuttoning her top to score extra points is bound to be an extra jubooblient night. Ah,just like the old days...

Seriously though, lots of new faces. Always nice when that happens. In the first game, the Clavins were hitting for the upperdecks, slamdunking everything in sight, greasing their shuttlecocks with wild abandon and several other sports metaphors as well as they tried to make up for their surprise loss the night before. But their sure-thing victory was plucked away from them at the last moment by upstarts Lowered Expectations who jokered for a perfect, wicked 20 in the last round. Daaaag! Meanwhile, DC Smackdown Champs (how long they gonna ride that win?) were feeling pretty cocky until they slipped to third and then lost a tie-breaker on what year the Teletubbies debuted. (The Team at the Bar, our second place winning team from City vs City clearly blew all their brain cells last night as they barely registered on the scoresheet and fled into the night after the first game. Wise choice boys.)

After a Halftime Show of current Top 40 artists (Ne-yo? Akon? Mims? Who the hell are these clowns? What happened to names I recognize? Icicle Works? Foghat? Anyone? How about Taco?) we got to the second game where those new terrors Les Cousins Dangereux (formally Lowered Expectations) jokered for 20 again in the final round to take another win. Back to back? You gotta be kidding me! That's just cruel. We have new contenders at the Pour House people. Memorize their ruthless smily faces, you'll be seeing them again soon.

GAME ONE
Lowered Expectations (35 - First)









The Clavins (34 - Second)










Falwell Devastated Upon Meeting Black Jesus
(31 - third, tie-breaker winners)









And their challengers:
The Team at the Bar 24
Paris Does Prison 21
Both J. Falwell and Gilmore Girls Finally Die 28
Go Quiz Yourself 18
Just the 3 of us 27
The Moral Majority 24
Fallswell that Ends Well 28
Moral Minority 24
And Then There Were Two 17
The Devil Went Down to GA. and Burned That Shit Down 24
Tommy Thompson for President 21
I Din't Have Gas Today 21
DC Smackdown Champs 31

GAME TWO - Theme Name: What Porn was Jerry Watching When He Died?

Les Cousins Dangereux 37









Jesus, Joseph and Mary: A Threesome 30









Passion of the Dikes 30









And the rest...
I Dismember Mama 18
Christian Coalition Cocks 15
Oral Majority 23
Clavins 30
The Oral Majority III: Wynches in Lynchburg 30
Tinky Winky's Stinky Pinky 26
Jesus Does Nazareth 30
Wet Hot Passion of the Christ 27
Tinkie Winkie's Tinkie Winkie 23
Second Cumming of Jesus 27
The Best of Incest: Jesus Does the Not-So-Virgin Mary 28

Oh and by the way, many people commented on Rebecca's lovely Eastern Market shirt ( I think you all wanted an excuse to look at her C-cups) and as she no doubt told you they are available for sale at many Capitol Hill vendors including Marvelous Market and Dawn Price Baby (the shirt, not the C-cups). Go here for more info or to donate to the cause.

And remember! Tomorrow we learn the winning city in the City vs City Smackdown. Stay tuned! Well, no, don't. Untune and come back tomorrow. That just makes more sense.